Monday, January 21, 2008

What happened in that bathtub

"They" are at it again, bowdlerizing jump-rope and nursery rhymes. In some versions, a turtle has been substituted for Tiny Tim. In others, Tiny Tim still stars, but he does not die. Here's one cleaned-up version:
Tiny Tim
I had a little brother, his name was Tiny Tim.
I put him in the bathtub to see if he could swim.
He drank up all the water, he ate up all the soap.
And now he's home sick in bed with bubbles in his throat.
In came the doctor, in came the nurse.
In came the lady with the alligator purse.
"Measles," said the doctor,
"Mumps," said the nurse.
"Chicken pox," said the lady with the alligator purse.
I don't want the doctor, I don't want the nurse.
I don't want the lady with the alligator purse.
Everybody knows that he died last night with a bubble in his throat. And the doctor, nurse, and lady with the purse all said "dead," and then "out went the doctor, out went the nurse, out went the lady with the alligator purse." An alternate is "in came the lady with the big fat purse" and "out went the lady with the little skinny purse."

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